My Wish List

A friend asked me what I wanted to see happen regarding the Catholic abuse crisis, what I thought it would take to resolve this complicated issue, and this is what I came up with:

I want the Pope to publicly repudiate two doctrines: crimen solicitations and mental reservation. Crimen solicitations has been referred to a lot in the news lately; at its core, it proscribes secrecy in dealing with SA. Mental reservation means, essentially, a cleric can hide part of the truth if he thinks it serves a greater good. This has been used to justify lying to civil authorities, victims, advocates. I'm sorry, but I know for a fact two bishops in Iowa lied under oath about abuse cases. I want the Pope to repudiate these doctrines and ask forgiveness for all the damange they have caused.

I want the leadership system to change. An all-male hierarchy is at the heart of the problem. I'm certainly not anti-men: I love my husband very much, he is my best friend. I love my son and am proud of how he treats women. I love my male friends. But an all-male system is intrinsically unbalanced. Don't you think if there had been a few mothers running the show this would have unfolded quite differently??? And yes, I know women can abuse and women can enable, but the balance is what's lacking.

I want an end to celibacy rules. Richard Sipe, a former priest, researched the issue and found, through self-reporting, at any one time only 50% of priests are celibate. Their relationships by necessity are furtive and deceitful. If priests were allowed to marry, as they were in the earlier days of the church, and women shared leadership as also was a part of the early church, it would be healthier.

I want the laity to share leadership in a real and meaningful way. As it is, they have to accept whatever comes their way, or leave. I want them, also, to step up to the plate. Too many are not willing to challenge the church authority.

I would like laity to consider witholding funds until the churh is more proactive on the abuse issue. There is a movement to do so, which you can find on the Web if you're interested.


I want people who leave not to be disrespected. I am, according to the church's teaching, an apostate or heretic, I'm not sure which, but both are viewed as people who are going to hell. I am viewed as having an invalid marriage, because I was baptized as a Catholic when I was a baby but married in a different church. What does that make my children, in their eyes? There was a move during the time of Vatican II to be more accepting of other faiths, but that has ended under this pope, who proclaims that Protestant churches are not churches in the true sense of the word. What does this have to do with the abuse situation? When you believe you are the only holders of sacred truth, it's a lot easier to do whatever it takes to prevent people from seeing the problems in your system.

I want the bishops who covered up for abusers to stand trial in criminal court, where that's appropriate. And, of course, I want the abusers to be held accountable.

That's my wish list.